The Most Important Relationship We Will Ever Have Is Our Relationship With Ourselves
I was not too fond of 2022 because this year was about unpacking the most challenging question of “Who am I?” and being at peace with the discoveries. Today, I am still asking myself those three words: Who am I? This year, this question has become my north star and the guiding compass of my self-management and relationship with Brian.
As we think about today and the remaining weeks in 2022, let’s not lose sight of the fact that we have the unique opportunity to invest time and energy not just in others but also in ourselves. The relationship with ourselves is the most important relationship we ever nurture.
Regrettably, I’m still learning that relationships and listening are two of the most critical human skills a person must possess and master to have a sustainable positive impact in any endeavour. Relationship masters are gifted listeners, and master listeners are talented relationship partners. I guess I am still a work in progress.
Today reminds me that each day is a sacred gift and an honour to continue exploring and reaching for our outer limits. The light shines on our souls just once in life. Don’t let it burn out! There is always an untapped reservoir of burning purpose and potential within us waiting to be revealed and activated. The most valuable present we will ever receive is the gift of being alive. A thought process many of us lost during Covid and throughout 2022.
Too often in our lives, we focus on the outer versions instead of the inner versions of who we are. Slow down; my journey, our journey, and everyone’s journey toward self-mastery is a marathon, not a sprint, that will challenge us to the depths of who we are ― which can and should be uncomfortable. Yet turning inward on our journey provides us with the transformative opportunity to discover our authentic selves and the experiences that ignite our creativity, innovation, and passion.
I forgot this year, we each have a purposeful calling and assignment that only we can accomplish with our experiences, skills, and talents. As I go inward with life’s unknowns, silence and stillness ultimately enable me to cultivate deeper clarity and connection. Regrettably, silence and stillness are my ultimate fear. While we all live through this period of history with immense and rapid change, each of us is responsible for investing in our own self-transformation.
In 2022 I became a prisoner of other people’s expectations. Forgetting, no matter how well someone knows or loves you, they will never see you or the world through your lens. Therefore, each day is a unique opportunity to understand what your future holds. As we commit to our self-growth, always hold yourself to one standard — to be the best version of who you are.
Each day we truly get to start again. Every day becomes an opportunity to mature, evolve, and travel the roads less travelled to uncover the outer depths of who we are. As long as we keep moving forward step-by-step, we are growing. Do not take life too seriously. Our time is limited no matter our longevity, so let’s make every day count.
Suppose we attempt to shortcut and skip this inward self-exploration, self-acceptance, and self-discovery process. In that case, we will feel the adverse effects on our attitudes, behaviours, and overall performance. We should give ourselves grace daily in realizing that the self we know at this moment is constantly evolving. When we stop being distracted continuously by our mental chatter, technology, or reacting to external situations, we become aware of our breath and our state of being. In a world where we can be anything, we often choose to be something other than ourselves. Being ourselves starts with self-compassion, self-discipline, self-leadership, and self-love. Being ourselves and showing up authentically begins when we permit ourselves to unlearn behaviours and habits that no longer serve us while leaning into life’s sometimes difficult but necessary questions.
It is easy and comfortable to look outside ourselves for someone or something to save us from our current state and underestimate the transformative power of looking inward and at ourselves. Every day I’m reminded that the most important relationship I will ever have is the relationship with myself. Relationships should be about investing in others and helping people become their best selves. Whether brief or lasting, every relationship plays a transformative role in determining who we are and who we will become. The best relationships find their roots in mutual love, care, respect, and a cultivated space to agree and disagree. These relationships are built from a deep curiosity to get to know another person. The minute you think you have won or already know something is the minute you stopped listening and have lost.
As we embark on the journey of building genuine and authentic relationships, dare to think differently and be different while never forgetting to be kind to everyone you meet. Because everyone is fighting some battle you know absolutely nothing about.
Each day we should aspire to keep growing, improving, and bringing immense intentional presence to the relationship with ourselves and the opportunity at hand. In life, there is legitimately no finish line. We do not need to rush where we are today or where we aspire to be tomorrow. Yet, we should be intentional, accountable, and strategic.
Never stop being uniquely you.