You and I crave it.

It may mean we made it. It could mean we are now appreciated. Or our talents have finally been recognized.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t always happen this way. Occasionally, we don’t get picked first and may be traded. And sometimes, it has absolutely nothing to do with us.

Positive individuals, managers, or friends will tell you to ignore absolutism and instead begin choosing yourself.

How often do we allow our self-worth to be determined by an employer, a prospective company, someone we love, or an outside critic? Each external force we have minimal control over.

We can’t keep digging our own graves. The need to crave approval and acceptance must stop now! 

It’s essential to make peace with ourselves. We’re not for everyone. And not only are we not for everyone, but we’re also not for most people. Instead of living with whether we’re selected first or whether we get the ideal job, let’s reframe it. What if we begin appreciating our own strengths and find harmony with the fact — what people think of us is none of our business?  

Let’s begin by picking ourselves first!

Stop predicting, anticipating, and second-guessing what we could have done differently. Let’s stop psychoanalyzing every minute detail. Let’s stop judging ourselves and stop living and dying for approval.

As difficult as that can sound, we should not allow someone’s incompetence to view our worth and function as a criticism of our abilities.

How about we stop waiting to be picked first? Today, put an end to surrendering our happiness to the approval of others. Let’s appreciate that regardless of whether we’re chosen first, hired, or given a new opportunity, we wake up the same optimistic, positive, and cheerful person.

As long as we’re not being disrespectful and offensive, what people think of us is truly none of our business.

Today, let’s do something different! Together, let’s defy the tyranny of being picked. And reset our watches to a time when we pick ourselves first.

—Brian Nadon